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  • Family fun

    “It’s about communicating with our kids,

    talking to them and listening to

    their answers.”



  • children.


    Now on Sale!

        Respect YOUR Children

         A Practical Guide To Effective Parenting


Featured Shows

blogtalkradio-logo Listen to Jay at BlogTalkRadio live. Access past radio episodes and follow for future episodes! Explore Jay's shows which discuss various issues within the family relationship and assist people to become a generation of change, and not repeat the negative patterns from their past.

See Featured ListSee Past Episodes

Who is the Family Answer Man?

Jay Fitter is a licensed family therapist with 20 years experience and answers your questions on all relationships issues.

Why He Does it…

My father had a 3rd grade education, and my mother 5th grade. My childhood was spent in poverty, moving in and out of apartments and motels. Much of our food came from church donations and we had used clothing.

My father was verbally and physically abusive and died when I was sixteen. I had already been working to help support the family, but after he passed , I had to work full time. My parents were told by school administrators when I was in elementary school that I was going to be a drop out. I attended in excess of twenty schools, often not even remembering what state I was in. There was virtually no adult guidance through my childhood and teen tears, as a result I made a lot of poor choices.

When I became an adult, I decided that I didn’t want to pass this kind of life on to my children.

I have seen the positive changes that have occurred in parents, kids, and even hard core gang members in juvenile hall. I know that we can’t change the past, but we don’t have to repeat it either.

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Ask Jay

Ask Jay

Ask Family Therapist, Jay Fitter through Facebook. Present your questions during a LIVE show and your answers may be aired.


[  Live Facebook Feed ]

I Can't Live Without Him:

Q. Hi I need advice. I have been with my husband for 6 years but married for 5 in a few months. In the last 6 years he has turned hateful and completely mean. We experienced a loss of a child a year before we married and since then he says hurtful things and yells at me in front of company. That has only started here recently. He goes out all the time and doesn't come home until 3 or 4 in the morning sometimes. I believe he may be cheating on me as well. I have 2 children and one is mentally and physically handicapped. He doesnt help me around the house and yells when I don't have his clothes clean for him. Especially if I am behind on laundry. What should I do? I love him and I am at a loss as to what to do.

A. I want you to ask yourself this question: Do I love him, or am I afraid to be without him?
Everything you have described it Is consistent with someone who is being emotionally and verbally abused, to the point where they question their own self-worth. A successful relationship must work both ways, each party needs to support and encourage the other in a loving way. This doesn't seem to be happening in your relationship. He tells you you're worthless, and because you've heard it enough times, you have come to believe that it's true.
Things are not just going to magically get better. I think it would be helpful for you to reach out to a women's support group, or shelter in your area. This may be scary, but they can help you get back on track in building your self-esteem, and demanding that you be treated with respect in any relationship.
I'm not saying that you need to be in a new relationship, just that this one is currently not helpful for you or your children. You don't want them to grow up believing that this is a normal way for a husband and wife to treat each other. If it's difficult for you to find the courage for yourself to initiate change, do it for your children.
If you know someone that may benefit from the information on this page, please feel free to forward the post to them. If you want to receive all of the questions and answers from this site, just "like" Family Answer Man Facebook page. I will attempt to answer your questions on Parenting, Relationships, and Children submitted in a timely manner. Send a private message if you don't want your name to be seen. Face to face sessions, and telephone coaching is also available.

2 months ago  ·  



“It’s about communicating with our kids, talking to them and listening to their answers”


Respect Your Children, Now Available on 


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Media Kit

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Get in Touch

Contact Mr. Jay Fitter on Facebook, Twitter, or through email.  To schedule an appointment, please contact Jay’s office phone number – (951) 272-8304

Jay’s office is located in Southern California.

jay [at] familyanswerman.com

(951) 272-8304